I Hear You

I have a problem. I love to help people out if I can. It gives me a nice feeling inside. If I can make a difference in even one persons life maybe my existence on this tiny planet is not for nothing. My problem is there are times when I either can't or should not even try to help out. I will give you an example of course but that seems to be my thing.

I got to know someone online a handful of years back. Things went well but then one day she told me about how she was molested by her mothers boyfriend. She went on to say her own Mom did not believe her and did nothing about it. She told me about how her relationship with her Mom has been terrible ever since. She went on about her different fears and some of the problems she has had ever since. I so wanted to help. I so wanted to be her white knight to save her from it all. Of course she did not need it as she was getting married soon and he would be there for her. For the first time in a long time I held back. I was concerned, what if I say the wrong thing. I could really make an unfortunate situation worse. As much as I wanted to help my friend I just knew the best thing I could do is just listen and be supportive of my friend. I did, however, get a book and read up on the situation so I felt a little more comfortable talking with her after that making sure not to do or say the wrong thing but still being there for her.

Fast forward 11 years just because I hate to leave the story hanging. Her and her hubby are doing great. Her relationship with her Mom is not so good but her Mother in Law is the best. We still keep in touch every now and then. I so wanted to say some wise things but maybe the best thing I could possibly have done is what I did. I was supportive of my friend. I said a few things here and there but they were mostly words of encouragement.

I have had that happen before but I did not keep to myself. A friend who was pregnant came to me and said she was pregnant and had not told anyone. In the end I ended up telling her that she should talk to the father as he would be there for her. Embarrassingly that talk happened that night while I was near by at the bar. Luckily things turned out. They had the kid, got married and last I heard were doing very well but what if I was wrong?

So why bring this up? Am I trying to leave around little articles hoping someone will nominate me for saint hood? Hardly. I guess it is just something I needed to put in writing. I just need to remind myself from time to time the world does not always need saving. Sometimes the best thing you can do for a friend is just listen.


You just call out my name and you know wherever I am
I’ll come running to see you again.
Oh babe, don’t you know that,
Winter spring summer or fall,
Hey now, all you’ve got to do is call.
Lord, I’ll be there, yes I will.
You’ve got a friend.
You’ve got a friend.
Ain’t it good to know you’ve got a friend.
Ain’t it good to know you’ve got a friend.
You’ve got a friend.
--James Taylor: You've Got a Friend (lyrics)