| Secrets |
Have you ever had something that you just could not share or there is no one you can talk to? Something that happened late last year would be a classic example. A friend told me she was getting married but I found out fairly early on before very many people knew. You know you would just love to talk about it but you can't.
I have similar things happen at work all the time. I develop software systems for a living. Many a time, including this past Monday, I accomplish something that I have been working toward for a little while. Now sometimes the things I am doing I can not talk about but usually that is not a problem. I so wanted to tell someone on Monday what I had done. It just felt so good to have accomplished the task I was working on. Of course most people could care less and the few that might listen are being polite. When you tell that what happened than they either say that is nice or they wonder what else you did. Surely that little thing could not be what you are all excited about. (I just know I am going to regret that comment)
Well I will not bore you with details but I will just say I had a pretty good Monday. I hope everyone is able to sneak your own "Monday" into your life sometime soon.
Since this is such a little post I figured I would sneak in a email I received today. Enjoy.
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
_____________________________
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
____________________________
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
______________________________
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
_____________________________
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
It's nothing I know. What, you think I'd come running over here yelling, "I've got a secret to tell, please beat it out of me?" --Buffy the Vampire Slayer
I have similar things happen at work all the time. I develop software systems for a living. Many a time, including this past Monday, I accomplish something that I have been working toward for a little while. Now sometimes the things I am doing I can not talk about but usually that is not a problem. I so wanted to tell someone on Monday what I had done. It just felt so good to have accomplished the task I was working on. Of course most people could care less and the few that might listen are being polite. When you tell that what happened than they either say that is nice or they wonder what else you did. Surely that little thing could not be what you are all excited about. (I just know I am going to regret that comment)
Well I will not bore you with details but I will just say I had a pretty good Monday. I hope everyone is able to sneak your own "Monday" into your life sometime soon.
Since this is such a little post I figured I would sneak in a email I received today. Enjoy.
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
_____________________________
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
____________________________
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
______________________________
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
_____________________________
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
It's nothing I know. What, you think I'd come running over here yelling, "I've got a secret to tell, please beat it out of me?" --Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Posted by barman at 2:07 PM::
Congrats on your accomplishment Barman. Although I'm sure that I wouldn't understand what you did even if you told me--I'd still listen. ;-)
Love the math examples. Especially shoppping math. LOL
I understand your feeling of secret accomplishment - you and I used to share that when we worked together - and as a writer, the one thing you cannot do is tell people what you have done until it is really DONE.
On relationships: Dating - when you turn up at your girlfriends house and she is pretty, dressed and ready to go.
Engagement - you turn up at your girfriends house, her hair is in curlers and she is in sweats, and she says you need to begin to know the real her.
Marriage - when she marries the man of her choice and then does her best to change him into the man she wanted in the first place.
Sithee
YES! actually, I do get this.
I have 3 manuscripts finished and laying in a trunk because I never could bring myself to mail them. Stories are good and all but let's face it, I suck at punctuation as you all have to have figured out by now. LOL!
Anyway, all through writing them everytime I would write a chapter that I thought was really exciting, I'd want to tell somebody but...who would even get it?
Sometimes someone tells me something---"OH DON'T TELL ANYONE!" So I stay quiet and I get so scared to 'slip up'----that I automatically forget what they tell me. It's like a self-defense mechanism where I can't fail. Weird huh?
Cute post!
Why didn't you email me? I would have listened you goof! I hope you are still as happy as you were when you wrote this post.
Yes, blogger is back up!
You know, I suppose that is part of what bloggs can be used for. Even if you get no comments it will still feel good to put it in black and white.
KB and Sing Gurl thanks, you guys are to kind to me.
John, maybe I should just make things up. Let's see, I could tell what really happened to Jimmy Hoffa or how on the side I am a deep undercover agent. I mean who would suspect me? I guess I better keep working at it.
Roxi, I think I just saw Buffy. If you hurry you can probably catch her.
Cabcake, that makes sense, I never thought of it that way. I know when I develope something it is not ready for anyone elses eyes until I have given it a many times over. Have you ever considered letting a close friend or two read some of your writing and ask for comment. I know John has done that before (as a matter of fact I have something I need to read now, opps). Close friends may not get you a lot of tough comments but maybe that would be good.
Deb, I do that all the time. In my case I think it is just a bad memory but I think I like what you said instead.
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